Tag: Authenticity

Confidence #4
Posted in Confidence

Becoming a Clear Decision Maker: Confidence #4 Insights

Posted on by HOLLY STEVENS

Once you make a decision, the Universe conspires to make it happen

Ralph Waldo Emerson

You can discover that you are MORE than any failure you have ever had. Feel renewed knowing that you have the power to overcome any obstacle that comes or is put in your way. Having that amazing feeling knowing you are GREATER than ANYTHING you ever face. Consider this thought. You wouldn’t be here if you weren’t given, or didn’t have access to the ability to be an “over-comer.”

We have the ability to connect with an inner source to allow us to be a clear, confident decision maker. We have access to our own GPS. It is a guidance system that we can turn to and listen to any time. It helps us with choices that guide us to our purpose with passion.

When we explore our Intuition and let our inner voice guide us, we will automatically feel it. We will know when a choice we make is in harmony with our highest good. Learn to pay attention to your inner voice. It will give you the confidence to make any decision in your life.

We are all given a purpose in this life. This is a purpose that serves our highest good. We are given the true Authentic Self-Confidence to pursue discovering that purpose. When we discover this purpose, we develop a passion and love that fills us from within. No one or anything can give us this from the outside. Unlocking confidence in our decision making is yet another stepping stone in our path to our purpose, passion, and dreams.

Being really clear on what we would love our life to be, making confident decisions from that very place. We must realize, there are many different types of decisions we make in any given day. These decisions can and will impact our self-confidence. This provides a new level of understanding. It builds trust in how making those choices can help our purpose, passion, and dreams.

We develop an understanding and trust. This development guides us to know when we are operating for our highest good and when we are not. We discover two secret keys to get in touch with our inner voice. These keys help us know with Authentic Self-Confidence that we are making the best possible decision. This assurance applies no matter the situation or circumstance we face in that moment.

So, what do we do when we want a bowl of ice cream? We get up and go to the freezer. We grab the container of vanilla and the ice cream scoop. Sometimes, we grab a bowl and a spoon. We are ready to enjoy! We made a decision and took the steps needed to achieve the goal. That was a simple one. Yet, if the chocolate ice cream had also been in the freezer, the decision would have been made more challenging. We make decisions every day of our lives; some are easy, others more difficult.

We have all found ourselves in situations where we had no clue what to do. We didn’t know what direction to take or what move to make. We just couldn’t decide what the best thing to do was. We all feel that way at times. We have options and opportunities before us. We just don’t know what the right choice would be. We get stuck in the “thinking” about decisions. This keeps us stuck. We do not move ahead to our purpose, passion, and the life we love living. This is NOT the place we would like to stay for any time. Instead, we want to connect with the source within us that will help us become clear, confident decision-makers.

As part of the human experience, we all make decisions. Most of the decisions we make are done without thinking about them, they come out of habit, or by default. Some decisions need much more consideration and planning. We debate with ourselves back and forth on what the “right” thing to do is. We even turn to others for advice. During all this, there is ONE (GPS) guidance system. We can each turn to it at any point and time. When we really listen, it helps us make the choices. These choices propel us in the direction of being the person who CAN, DO, and BE whatever we choose.

The key is strengthening our personal relationship with the part of us that already knows ALL THE ANSWERS, our Intuition. When we allow our Inner Voice to guide us, we sense when a choice aligns with our highest good. We can tell when a decision matches our best interest. We become more aware of what the cues are. When we pay attention to them, they will guide us toward freedom. They lead to happiness in all areas of our life.

There are times that we feel that we haven’t made the best choice or decision… We just need to take a breath. Send a kind glance toward that thought. Look at life through a new lens, the lens of clarity. Focus on our inner Self, Intuition, the one who is here to give us confidence. We need this confidence to make any choice or decision, whether great or small.

Here is a recap of what I have learned, utilizing myself and also want to share with you so you can do the same:

  • I have the ability to make a snap decision, or a considered decision.
  • Confidence in decision-making comes with knowing what I really want, and serving it with my time and attention
  • The most important decision I will make is to choose where within myself I find the place to make choices. These choices must matter to me.
  • If I make a decision that matters to me, it is okay to get it wrong. It is part of the process on the way to getting it right.
  • No one else can know what my Inner Voice is telling me. Not even a trusted advisor, or someone close to me.
  • Deep down, there is only one thought that really matters: “I would really LOVE to do this.”
  • The voice that assists me in making decisions about an idea offers guidance. It provides either feelings of greater expansion or contraction.
  • Confidence in my ability to make decisions is something that can absolutely be grown and developed.

There are three things that were suggested that I do to help me become a Clear, Confident Decision Maker:

  1. To consider some decisions I am making and notice the feeling I get while making them. Am I feeling expansion or contraction? What do I sense about those feelings?
  2. When I am making a decision, I lean in to the voice of truth. It is the part of me that already knows the answer.
  3. Each day, I pay attention when I am making decisions. I notice if there is a gravitational pull toward the familiar. I also observe if there is a feeling of contraction or one of expansion.

We are moving into the final step of Authentic Self-Confidence. This is Confidence #5. I will be sharing about Freedom From the Opinions of Others. This was a huge one for me. We have built a belief in ourselves. Anytime we face criticism or discouragement from outside sources, we CAN STAND TALL, STRONG, and CONFIDENT anyway. Many powerful people have utilized this secret formula to grow their authentic self-confidence. Now, we are unshackling and developing ours too!

Here’s to listening and hearing our inner voice!!

Holly

Posted in Confidence

Understanding Confidence #2: Empowering Your Growth

Posted on by HOLLY STEVENS

Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage and confidence in the doing.

Theodore Roosevelt

Now that we are clear about what True Authentic Self-Confidence is, we understand what it is not. We also know where it comes from. We understand that we all feel a lack of confidence at times. This often happens when we try something new. Fear can cause us to stop moving forward, yet, we can have fear WITHOUT fear having us! Confidence is not the absence of fear – it is continuing to grow and move forward despite the fear. We can grow and strengthen our confidence muscles by doing things that scare us. And we can also learn to step into fear, and actually befriend it.

We gain new strength when we understand what fear really is. We also gain strength by understanding what confidence really is. This strength overcomes doubts and worries. These are the doubts and worries that have kept us stuck in our current circumstances. Knowing confidence is NOT the absences of fear. Self-Confidence is growing and moving PAST FEAR, and towards our calling from the Infinite.

We recall moments of achievement. These arise when we look back over our lives. This happened because we took that risk, and we SUCCEEDED! Taking action is sometimes the greatest satisfaction, especially when we are doing it afraid. Fear is a real part of life. No one doesn’t face fear in their life. We must understand, fear is not just a phobia of spiders, snakes, bugs, etc. Fear can be a fear of heights or confined spaces. It can manifest in being in front of people or even driving on an unknown road. The fear we experience most of the time is much more subtle. It steals our confidence. Sometimes we aren’t even fully aware of it. It keeps us stuck. It causes us to question ourselves, thoughts of “what if I’m not good enough?”, “What if I don’t like what I learn about myself?”, “what if others don’t agree?”, “Is this really even possible?”. We MUST REMEMBER we are NOT ALONE feeling this way.

As we pursue our passion and purpose in our life, we long to live a life we love. We will face new territory. There will be new people, new places, and different ‘things’ we have never experienced before. This can make us feel afraid to take the next step. The TRUTH is, we ALL feel a lack of confidence when trying something new. Fear creates a physical and emotional response. These responses can cause us to stop moving forward. Unfortunately, up until now, we have let them. Now that we have a better understanding of Self-Confidence, we realize it is our connection to the Infinite. We KNOW we have CONFIDENCE already WITHIN US. We can befriend fear, move beyond it, and continue moving forward with passion and purpose. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN US HAVING FEAR, AND FEAR HAVING US!

This my friends is how we GROW CONFIDENCE muscles! We do the things that scare us. Continually pushing through challenges. By doing so, leading us to a higher version of our SELF. When we step into our greatness, we will undoubtedly have fear. Still, we CAN make friends with that fear. This creates another stepping stone in our path or a brick in our foundation. The One breathing us will ALWAYS help us find the confidence and courage when WE SEEK IT.

Here is a recap of what I have learned, utilizing myself and also want to share with you so you can do the same:

  • I grow MY CONFIDENCE by feeding MY FAITH and starving my fear.
  • The voice of fear is ALWAYS the voice of contraction, living a smaller version of myself.
  • Knowing and believing that Confidence is my birthright.
  • To pursue my purpose and passion, is not only reaching for the goal, it is achieving strength in my confidence.
  • I can feel the fear and do it anyway!
  • Fear is in the future. Doubt is from the past. Worry is the misuse of my imagination. CONFIDENCE IS IN ME ALWAYS!
  • Fear is actually the border of the reality that I know.
  • With my growing, expanding confidence, I have learned the difference between having fear and fear having me.
  • I must be aware that fear speaks through distraction, dissuasion and distress.
  • Fear is my companion as I grow, and I CAN make friends with that voice of fear!

There are a couple of things that were suggested that I do when I feel that fear is “moving in”

  1. Write down my fear thoughts, and ask myself “Is that actually happening RIGHT NOW?”
  2. Engage with gratitude! Which choices can I be grateful for in THIS MOMENT?

I will share the next step in the Confidence #3 post: Turning Obstacles into Opportunities. We have identified our Authentic Self-Confidence. We know it’s a trustworthy source. Fear has absolutely no hold on us. Ask yourself this: Can we take our experience of “failure” and use it for growth? Can it expand our confidence to pursue our purpose and passion? Failure is nothing to be ashamed of; it is nothing less than a stepping stone. Were you a failure every time you fell down while learning to walk? Absolutely not! We can be inspired by some of the most famous failure-to-success stories out there.

Here’s to learning to FEED OUR FAITH, and starve our fear!!

Holly

Posted in Confidence

Discover the Power of Authentic Confidence #1

Posted on by HOLLY STEVENS

If one advances Confidently in the direction of his dreams, he will meet with success. By endeavoring to live the life he has imagined, he’ll meet with a success unexpected in common hours.

~Henry David Thoreau

Connecting with your TRUE SELF, this is your internal power connecting with the Infinite. The Infinite gives us Confidence, because it IS Confidence. When open to this connection with the Infinite, we can expand our personal awareness. We experience our TRUE SELF. This allows us to live a life of TRUE LOVE.

Knowing that Authentic Self-Confidence is our birthright, because we are alive and breathing, creates a deserving of Confidence. We deserve to be empowered to speak and act on our TRUE SELF. Having trust in ourselves. Doubts come up, we recognize them and let them go. We can take a deep breath and stay in our calm, and open state of mind. When we trust the Infinite, we trust ourselves.

Something to remember: We do NOT generate our Self-Confidence, we draw from our Authentic Self-Confidence.

Thinking back to your childhood, what did you want to be when you grew up? Do you recall what it was? How about after graduating from high school – was there a passion for career plans? Did you ever pursue that dream? Or as for many of us grown-ups, did your confidence in those ideas just fade away as did the time? As the time goes by, it seems our ability to dream and have belief in ourselves can just dwindle away. Outside forces often stop us from doing what we would love to do. They prevent us from being who we would love to be. We must choose to awaken our TRUE SELF. In doing so, we discover that we have unshakable confidence inside ourselves. This confidence is in our very DNA. So, you ask, if confidence is IN us, how do we access it?

Let’s start here, with another common questions: What exactly is self-confidence and self-image?

For many of us, self-confidence and our self-image are formed by outside influences. Our parents and school teachers train us to “think” we must live a particular way. Even people in popular culture influence us to behave, act, or try to look a certain way. Maybe unskilled people made insensitive comments when we went out on our own or tried something different. They did the best they knew at the time. These comments harmed our confidence, allowing us to settle. We went on feeling unworthy to live the life we were dreaming of and meant to live. We need to know in our minds and hearts that there is MORE IN US deep down! Something GREATER, something that IS full of the confidence we’ve been freely given and we deserve. Our SPIRIT is calling us, desiring us to realize that WE ARE CAPABLE of MORE, simply because WE ARE MORE!

Whatever you choose to call it – Spirit, Source, Being, or simply Self. Whatever its name, the internal power is in connection with the Infinite. The Infinite breathes us and beats our hearts. The Infinite provides our unending supply of confidence because it IS CONFIDENCE. We need to be open to connecting with the Infinite. This openness will expand our awareness. Then, we experience the life we desire.

We are DESERVING of Authentic Self-Confidence, it is our BIRTHRIGHT! simply by virtue of being born and alive. When we draw from this self-confidence, we feel safe to speak and act on OUR truth. No one is entitled to override this. Not even ourselves. This is a deep sense of trust in our SELF, then by extension, the world. Restoring the trust in ourselves allows us to be still within our self. We can listen from within our self. We give our self permission to be quiet and be connected with the Infinite. This connection helps us to know and share our TRUE SELF.

Something to remember: We are ALL brought into this world in the same way, we are each a blessing born! We had only the Infinite to trust to “interpret” our communication to our caregiver getting our basic needs met… when we were hungry, “I am hungry” cry. When we were wet, “My diaper needs changed” cry, something is uncomfortable, “I’m not feeling good” cry. We trusted, as we knew no other way, it was our only option. As we’ve grown, we received grace from our caregivers as we learned to crawl. Then, we learned to walk. We began to talk with many ups and downs. Then as we got older, that trust was channeled to our earthly ways and our earthly understandings. We became molded to our earthly mind, generating our confidence. We did not draw from the confidence we have already been given.

Here is a recap of what I have learned, utilizing myself and in addition want to share with you:

Confidence is NOT based in our behavior, past, talents or IQ!

Confidence IS based in knowing and trusting there IS a power within US that gives us life!

We are human, and we are NOT able to feel 100% confident 100% of the time!

Everyone of us feels less confident at times than we want to.

So this is when we need to “borrow” confidence and strength from another. I have been so blessed and fortunate. There are people in my life whose confidence I have borrowed. This confidence has provided the strength to reconnect to my Infinite. I LOVE to pay-it-forward, giving to others what has been given to me!

Our Spiritual DNA is PERFECT, and inside of that spiritual DNA is PERFECT CONFIDENCE!

We have to CHOOSE to re-access the confidence we were born with. Confidence has already been GIVEN to us, as our BIRTHRIGHT. In the unconscious detour in life, we were NOT meant to “generate” confidence. Creating an ego gets in our way and creates a dead end on our detour.

Our longing for a greater confidence is actually the echo of the very Power breathing us, and beating our hearts.

Confidence comes from a source INSIDE us. This source is GREATER than any opinion. It is much STRONGER than any circumstance or situation.

Knowing and trusting your AUTHENTIC self that YOU are doing YOUR BEST in ANY moment, circumstance, or situation. I know and trust that I can consciously check in with myself, accepting that I am not perfect. However, this perfect moment is here to be, and to do my best!

No one else is you. No one else cares exactly the way you care. No one else is wired exactly the way you are wired. YOU ARE UNIQUE!

Unshackling an unshakable confidence helps us to overcome difficulties and master fears!

Our body is a GIFT. This is true regardless of our opinions about its size, shape, color, or being. It also holds true regardless of the opinions others have had.

Opinion is NOT truth!

Most of the time, everyone has an opinion—that is just what it is—an opinion. We only need to be concerned with our own opinions. They come from within our core, authentic, true self.

There are three things that have been asked of me to do on a continual basis, reminding me of MY AUTHENTIC TRUE SELF, that NO ONE else can do FOR ME:

  1. Make a list of my successes and recall the feelings I FELT with each of the achievements.
  2. Look myself in the mirror. I remind myself WHO I AM. I acknowledge the POWER that is IN ME. I have been blessed with this power as MY BIRTHRIGHT.
  3. Use the words “up until now” when recalling negative comments and opinions. These include situations and circumstances that I or others have related to ME.

The next step I will share with you in Confidence #2 post is Feeling the Fear and Doing it Anyway. Realizing when we feel afraid of something, we are NOT alone. The Power inside of us is willing to empower, participate, and encourage us EVERY STEP OF THE WAY! As we face that fear and befriend it. We MUST remember that it was ONLY UP UNTIL NOW that it tried to hold us back. Exposing the symptoms of fear, makes it loose its effectiveness. I have learned one very significant step that I have taken to redirect my fear into my personal power. I am so blessed to share with you my journey to Authentic Self-Confidence.

To Your Authentic Core Self, having Authentic Self-Confidence,

Holly

Posted in Confidence

Unshackling Authentic Self-Confidence: A Journey Within

Posted on by HOLLY STEVENS

Where does your feeling of confidence come from? The ring on your finger? the vehicle you drive, your job title? your education? your parents/children’s status/success? the physical possessions you have? Where you live? your community status quo?

OR

Does your confidence come from within YOU? Knowing your physical being is in regular close connection with your spiritual being. Understanding your purpose in life. Knowing who you are with confidence lets you overcome fears. You learn from failures and make important decisions along the way. These empower you to create a life you love living. You understand your DNA of Authentic Self-Confidence. You know the truth of who you are. You feel comfortable and at ease in all areas of your life, no matter what.

Today’s society has a misconception of true authentic self-confidence and living from an external ego. Keeping up with the latest and greatest technology for our kids and ourselves to be {the new} social. I’m not referring to the need for technology for academics and work. Having the latest and greatest social apps so we can communicate 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Without eye contact, body language, and not knowing how to act when “in true person.” We post pictures that are ‘photoshopped’. We hope to never show our authentic, true selves. We do this because we never match up to the techno version we’ve created and put out there. Still, that “gap” WILL catch us. We won’t or can’t ever match up to the electronic version. Whether we are aware of it, it is riding on and in us consciously or unconsciously. It leads us to live in a world based on ego and defensiveness. We are running from ourselves or even trying to catch ourselves. This creates a double battle within us 24 hours a day, 7 days a week…

As my Mentors and Life Coaches have shared with me… I would like to share with you:

Some days we feel like we are on top of and can conquer the world! Other days, we don’t even want to get out of bed. We’ve all felt that way before. What is the difference between those kinds of days? Quite often, it is the degree of self-confidence we are feeling at that time. Many factors can influence how we feel about ourselves. They also impact our ability to do the things we want to do. It can be as simple as a ‘bad hair day.’ It can also be as tough as ‘feeling the pressure’ of living up to other’s expectations. These expectations include those we’ve put out there ourselves. There is a way to keep those outside influences from impacting our self-image and self-confidence. We can have more days when we feel powerful and unstoppable from within ourselves. We CAN live with AUTHENTIC SELF-CONFIDENCE empowering ourselves to love life, and love living life.

I have been taught by my teachers, mentors, and coaches. Life has also taught me through hard knocks. The truth is that we are spiritual beings who have a human experience. It is part of life that someone will say something insensitive to us that hurts our feelings or embarrasses us. The natural human response is to feel slighted or deeply hurt. It can sometimes snowball. Those unkind words play on repeat in our own minds. They develop other not-so-pleasant thoughts about themselves. This process tears down our self-esteem. Our self-image can also be affected by the perceptions we have. These perceptions come from experiences in our childhood. They can be both positive and negative. The key is: not to allow criticism or shame to become a part of our belief in ourselves. To achieve this, we need to understand who we are at our core. We should live from this core as often as possible. Let it become our pervasive thought process. It means we connect with our inner being. We recognize the Infinite side of us. We always know we are truly more than any situation, circumstance, or condition that we face. Living the absolute best we can, in any given moment, no matter what is coming AT us. Remembering, a boat can’t sink unless the water gets inside.

Our physical being must be closely connected with our spiritual being. This connection helps us gain a better understanding of our purpose in life. Authentically knowing who we are builds confidence. It empowers us to overcome fears and learn from failures. This knowledge helps us make important decisions. It also allows us to love life and love the life we are living. When we understand the DNA of Authentic Self-Confidence, we know the truth of who we are. We can feel comfortable in all areas of our life. We stay authentically self-confident, no matter what is coming at us.

When we commit to taking time to connect with the Power breathing us each day, we gain authentic confidence. This confidence allows us to look fear in the face. We can then do nothing less than become friends with it. We must always know that fear doesn’t mean we can’t, it only means we haven’t. Confidence comes only after we choose to do what we were once afraid to do.

Self-confidence grows from the seeds planted and harvested of overcoming challenges and failures, turning obstacles into opportunities. We must accept and be empowered by defeat, without being defeated. Failure is nothing more than feedback, it is actually showing us there is another way to do things.

As we make a daily decision to take action, building our Authentic Self-Confidence, we will realize Confidence is a choice. We have supreme authority over our OWN DECISIONS. We have dominion over our OWN THOUGHTS. Our THOUGHTS affect our FEELINGS, and in turn, our ACTIONS, creating our RESULTS. We are responsible and ‘RESPONSE-ABLE’ for every single thought we think, and move we make. We can be clear and confident in our decision making. Realize that Authentic Self-Confidence is the trait that transforms thoughts into action. This leads to the results we want! We confidently know there are no ‘shortcuts’. We must do confidently what is necessary for ourselves, no matter what anyone else thinks. This allows us to be the best we can be and create the authentic life we want.

You absolutely can grow Authentic Self-Confidence! All that is required is that you pay attention to YOUR ‘Inner Voice’. It all begins on the inside – inside of YOU!

How do you do that? You ask this question just as I was allowed to do. The first step is creating an understanding of what Authentic Self-Confidence is and is not. I will be sharing what I have learned in the next five posts about:

  • What I have learned about the truth about the source of where self-confidence comes from. Discovering what Confidence is, and is not. How to respond when Self-confidence takes a “hit”. Let it propel me towards a loving life. It should not derail me.
  • Stepping out of the comfort zone, doing it with confidence. Allowing authentic Confidence to overcome the fears that used to get in the way.
  • Changing perspective on failures in the past, now, and future. Everyone experiences failure in life. My response to the circumstances is what makes the difference in life.
  • I have been taught what the key is to making any important decision. I have made the most important decision in my life. I gained a new understanding to help me make any future choice with clarity and confidence.
  • This experience has brought me back full circle to the core of my Self-Confidence. I know that my Authentic Self is NOT made by the opinions of others. It is rather shaped from the inside out of ME. I received a secret formula. I have implemented it into my life. Some of the world’s most famous people have used this formula to create immense success in their lives and businesses.

I look forward to continuing my journey into greater Authentic Self-confidence and sharing these skills and outcomes with you. I have been blessed with many failures in my life. These failures have created stepping stones for me. At the time, I do not imagine those failures as blessings. I have been blessed with amazing mentors, coaches, therapists, pastors, and friends. Confidantes and many others have helped me, too. They have helped me recognize the stepping stones and lay them on the correct path. This has helped build the foundation for MY Authentic Core Self, creating Authentic Self-Confidence. I can only give because of what I have received. I strongly want to give others the blessings I have received…

To Your Authentic Core Self, having Authentic Self-Confidence

Holly

I am a Heart Centered Life Coach.

With heart centered life coaching, I believe that everyone has infinite potential to be, do, give and have whatever they desire.

I know that my clients are connected to a power that’s greater than any circumstance or problem they are currently facing, no matter how big those problems may seem, or how long the problem has existed.

I have a fundamental belief in the goodness of people, and I help my clients to get in touch with that goodness, and work with it, to bring forth a life they love living.

I will help you to tap into the wisdom, greatness and infinite potential that is already inside of you. I will do this instead of telling you what you can do and be, who you are, and what you should do.

In our coaching session, you will learn about yourself (as I will learn about you too) and what you want to be, do and give. You will realize that you are more empowered than you’ve ever realized you were and are liberated and set free to live a life you love living.

I have a purpose that inspires me to make the world better.

I believe that people deserve to have the life of their dreams, and that they can create that life.

I believe that everyone is placed on this earth with a divine purpose, and they have a burning passion within them that they may or may not be aware of.

I believe that no matter where we are in our life’s process, we have been given the stepping stones to discover our full potential and purpose, with pure passion.

I understand and believe that there is a power in all of us that is far greater than any circumstance, situation or condition!

I will give you the gift of committing to your vision regardless of conditions, regardless of how impossible it may seem to achieve, giving and empowering you the ability to create the life of your dreams.

I will empower you to open up to infinite possibilities.

I will empower you to tune to the wavelength of possibilities.

I will empower you to make your dream come true.

I will open you up to the possibility of the infinite ways you many not even realize yet. Giving you the gift of brave thinking, which is how extraordinary results are created with unprecedented ease and speed.

YOU inspire me, to EMPOWER YOU, to move forward and towards the results YOU WANT to create YOUR LIFE of unshackled happiness and freedom. To grow where YOU are planted and to BLOOM BEAUTIFULLY!

Empower Your Dreams: Heart Centered Life Coaching Benefits

Quote• Posted on by HOLLY STEVENS
Posted in Life Coaching

Empowering Others: Why I Became a Life Coach

Posted on by HOLLY STEVENS

Life Coach my why for becoming a certified life coach

I’ve clarified  what is a life coach?

I’ve shared a general prospective about Life Coaching… How does the process work?

Now, I want to share with you MY WHY of becoming a Certified Life Coach.

When I was in high school I had thoughts of being a mental health practitioner, however they were only fleeting thoughts. I began cosmetology school, to be ended by an ATV accident leaving me with medical advice that long hours on my feet and my arms elevated it would not be the career that I would physically be able to do. My heart was shattered in a million pieces. I loved the idea of helping others feel good about themselves and everyone loves getting their hair cut, colored, or done up for a special occasion. It just gives you that little “boost” and I was going to be able to do that for others.

A few years later, I became an advanced EMT and certified fire fighter, continuing on to paramedic school. This was a very fulfilling “duty”. I was helping others, and in some cases, after our job was done could only pray for these individuals not always knowing their final out come. After having my two daughters, choosing to not put myself in harms way, so I could be there for my girls. I was offered an opportunity to continue my education further, becoming a certified Whole Health Counselor. Providing me the ability to be of greater help in understanding and caring for my girls, and extended family members with chronic illnesses.

In 2004 I choose to leave my marriage that I had fought long and hard to keep, and believed in my heart could be made to work for our family’s sake. Ending up with a significant hospital stay due to stress related issues in 2003, marriage counseling, individual counseling, etc. I had to accept that “letting go” was the best and only option. One of the hardest things in life sometimes is letting go of what you feel and believe was the “dream” come true for your family.

I finished my schooling and graduated as a single mom. I spent the next 11 years focused on my priority of raising and advocating for my girls. Working in the health and human services field, and in an agriculture based job as my primary employments and several part-time jobs a long side to make ends meet. I continued keeping up with my whole health research, and continuing education to stay current not to loose what I’d worked hard to accomplish as I felt it was an answer to a prayer. I just wasn’t always sure what I was to do with it, knowing I needed to wait until my girls were graduated from high school before perusing a career change.

I consciously choose to challenge myself to always be the best me/mom I could be in any given moment, in any given circumstance or situation. To always try to be a better me/mom today, than I was yesterday. If that didn’t work out for me on any given day, I knew in my heart that I was doing my best! At the end of the day I “let go”, praying for forgiveness, and the grace to have the opportunity to give it my best shot tomorrow.

NOW! Now is when that answered prayer from many years back, has became VERY CLEAR to me! 15+ years I have had the time to “see” what my life’s journey to this day has been preparing me for, and a moment sooner would have been, a major life detour. During these years of learning and struggle, there has been an intense discovery of my life and purpose. Looking back, all the tears, struggles, doubt, literally screaming “WHY ME”?, hearing and saying “when there is a will, there is a way”, crying myself to sleep at night and more days than not feeling as though I was a failure to myself and my girls. The relationships that didn’t work out, the friendships I’ve been hurt by, the friendships that I have been blessed with, and the knowledge and experience is more than any text book can or ever will provide.

I discovered the Who, What, When, Where, and HOW of ME! I discovered my family of origin issues, faced them, dealt with them for ME, learning it wasn’t because of me it was what they knew best in dealing with situations and it wasn’t my place to take it on and/or fix it. This in turn allowed me to discover the why to my relationship issues, and that I could not rescue, enable, love others to their happiness, nor save them. I discovered that I was more than capable of taking care of myself physically, emotionally, environmentally, and spiritually. I was (am) a good mom and that my choices may not always of been the right ones, but they were the best ones I could make in the given moment. I have raised two amazing daughters, who are very authentic, strong willed, independently interdependent, and successful. They are full of Love, Compassion, Empathy, Care, and capable of conquering anything they set their mind to.

In 2016 post my second daughters high school graduation, I enrolled in my CE classes for whole health counseling. I was offered the opportunity to apply to Life Mastery Institute and was accepted into the Life Coach certification program. I can say I have literally traveled coast to coast to get the signed papers stating that I am educated, qualified, and accredited to provide professional services to and for others. However, the true education comes from the life experience that has been laid before me now behind me to fulfill a God given mission. I take on this mission with much passion, as I have spent my life HELPING others, and I will be the first to admit, it has not always been in the healthy means of helping.

I have learned through my life education, verified through my academic education, that I am here on this earth with a deep passion to EMPOWER others. Providing others with the knowledge, resources, belief and empowerment to be the best they can be in any given moment, circumstance or situation. Resting assured that there is no circumstance nor situation that is greater than themselves!

We can label, name, blame our situations and circumstances that have put us where we are today in this very moment. However, labels can possibly create some understanding as to the how we got here and why we are where we are. Naming can possibly give some clarification. Blaming, truly isn’t an option. Blaming is only displacing the issue that WE HAVE, and in reality we are the ONLY one who has control over the issue. The ONLY reason we Label, Name and Blame, is because we are HURT and uncertain how else to attempt to overcome, get rid of, or move on from an these issues that comes from dealing with others. Weather family, partner, co-workers or friends.

My Life Coaching mission and passion is to EMPOWER others to live A SPLENDID LIFE NOW! Teaching others how to UNSHACKLE their happiness, being happy who they are right now! Utilizing what they have went through or are going through to know they have been planted in the garden of grace and they will bloom! Living from the inside out.

When we live from the inside out, we can live with grace and peace no matter what we face. We allow ourselves to be all that we can be and allow others to do/be the same (in their own garden). We will learn that just because they may have weeds in their garden doesn’t mean they are/can/will plant weeds in ours, nor is it our responsibility to keep the weeds out of theirs. We know we will always have enough grace and peace for ourselves, we will know how to take care of our garden, harvest our supply when we need it, and know there is always more growing. When we take care of what we sow, we will always have a bountiful harvest when we need it.

It is when we become unshackled, we are free to pursue who we really are, what we are truly passionate about, and fulfill our purpose here on earth. After we unshackle ourselves from allowing others to hold the key, we are not always clear what or how we should “move on”. What we are truly capable of. What that looks like, with or without the support of our spouse or family.

I would love to share my garden harvest and my belief in YOU! Teaching and guiding you, empowering you, supporting you, and walking beside you in this journey of discovery. It is with great honor that I have been gifted this journey in life, and it would be of great honor to walk along side of you guiding you in your unleashing/unshackling process. Email me I would love to hear from you!!

If you would like, I would love to share 30 minutes with you unshackling, shoot me an email and we will set up a time that works for you!!

Here’s to UNSHACKLED HAPPINESS!!

Holly

Posted in Life Coaching

Understanding Life Coaching: What a Life Coach Does

Posted on by HOLLY STEVENS

life coaching what is a life coach

Life Coaching… What is a Life Coach?

A life coach is a professional mentor who helps you to:

  • Identify the dreams and desires that are aligned with your soul’s purpose, and that will make you feel authentically happy and fulfilled.
  • Remove the mindsets, habits and other obstacles that hold you back from activating and realizing those dreams.
  • Create a plan to turn your dreams into reality.
  • Take consistent, productive action on that plan, improve the plan when necessary, and overcome any setbacks or obstacles that appear along the way.
  • Master Invisible Laws of Success, so that reaching your goals becomes practically inevitable.

A life coach is someone who finds joy in using their gifts to help people create the lives of their dreams. Your life coach is the light that helps you see the answers you already have inside yourself and find the courage to pursue those answers, even when your circumstances tell you to just give up.

Life Coaching… What it is NOT!

  • A life coach is NOT like a Self-Help Book!

Self-help books often offer a one-size-fits-all solution. Even if they do allow some wiggle room for people to implement their teachings in a way that fits their personality and life, very few of them effectively help their readers implement the process in a way that creates real change. Self-help books become ‘shelf-help’: things that people read, are impressed by, use just a little bit, and them put away on the shelf without ever fully applying the tactic or strategies to their lives.

Even if people DO use their teachings, many books also fail to guide their readers through the process of coping with the old wounds and new obstacles that inevitably arise when a person attempts to change the status quo.

The ego and mind seldom allows the familiar to change without a fight, so life coaches provide their clients with ongoing support and tools to prevent them from slipping back into their old patterns, and to help them through the sometimes frightening transition from who they are right now to who they want to be.

  • A life coach is NOT a Therapist!

Therapy emphasizes getting people to talk about their problems, repeatedly bringing their focus back to their wounds, and trying to heal them. It doesn’t usually teach them how to stop the behavior that leads to those wounds, and to attract the life they want to live instead.

Life coaches help people understand why they went through the pain that they did, why they’re still  suffering, and why the same bad things keep showing up in their lives, but they DON’T focus on the wounds. Instead, they help their clients heal their emotional scars, regain faith in themselves, in the world, and change the habits and mindsets that have continued to attract that pain over and over again.

  • A life coach is NOT a Psychologist!

While both professions help people understand the human mind, life coaches go far beyond that. We use our understanding of the mind to unleash our clients’ inner power and creativity, to help them tap into wisdom that they didn’t know they had, and to turn their minds into powerful magnets that attract the people and circumstances they want, with far less time and effort on their part than conventional thinking would believe possible.

As Henry David Thoreau once wrote:

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”

We understand that the human mind works in conjunction with powerful and universal laws, and these laws govern whether you’ll succeed in any area of your life. Because of this, it is vital to know how to make your mind work in your favor, and life coaches show their clients how.

 

 

Posted in Confidence

What IF I AM: Finding Confidence Beyond Comparison

Posted on by HOLLY STEVENS

I Am NEW, I Am FREE, I Am STRONG, I Am a LIGHT IN THE DARKNESS, I Am an OVER COMER, I Am a CHILD OF GOD, I Am CHOSEN, I Am RIGHTEOUS, I Am LOVED, I Am an AMBASSADOR, I Am REDEEMED, I Am COMPLETE, I Am PROTECTED, I Am a CONQUEROR, I Am PROSPEROUS, I Am THE TEMPLE OF THE HOLY SPIRIT, I Am ROOTED.

When you look in the mirror who do you see?

YOU ARE good looking, YOU ARE smart, YOU ARE strong, YOU ARE valuable!

Do you sometimes think differently than this? before you answer this questions, take a moment and think about where any other response may come from. Why would you think otherwise? Where would these thoughts come from? Have they been spoken to you? Have you pondered these thoughts secretly? Are they rooted in doubt and insecurity or in confidence and truth?

We often tend to conform to the opinions of those around us, and use comparison to build our self-worth. We are whipping up a recipe of disaster for ourselves doing such a thing. Leading to a life being very fickle, and unhappy.

Comparison is a double-edge sward, too often leading to destruction! Stressing to fit in, wanting to stand out and the pressure to be perfect. These are all self induced afflictions, robbing us of our peace, joy and contentment. The bible warns us; “But when they measure themselves by one another and compare themselves with one another, they are without understanding” – 2 Corinthians 10:12 ESV

WHAT IF… YOU based your identity and self-worth on something other than the opinions of those around you or even your own opinions?

WHAT IF… YOUR value was based on something that never changes? Something that is fixed and decided for all eternity NEVER to be UNDONE? God determines WHO YOU ARE, and that is the ONLY “opinion” that matters!!

God NEVER changes in His thoughts towards YOU! He does not look at you as a lump sum of your decisions, nor does He judge you based on your worthiness. The moment you surrender to HIM, and confessing HIM as your Lord and Savior, is the moment God places a new identity on you, in you and for you!

He sees you as His child, He delights in YOUR HAPPINESS, and it is His firm desire to encourage and affirm your true identity—

I AM entitled to have passion, happiness, and healthy confidence. I was born to have, and live a life of passion, happiness and healthy confidence.

Send me an email at hollystevenswlc@gmail.com or message me https://www.facebook.com/ASplendidLifeNow to discover what Authentic Confidence is and how to feel safe enough to speak and act on our truth. We will learn the importance of connecting with the Infinite to expand our awareness and experience the life we would love to live. The very fact that we are alive and breathing means we deserve Confidence and this will help begin to restore trust in ourselves.